Food for the Way: Self-Control
And Jesus, full of the Holy Spirit, returned from the Jordan and was led by the Spirit in the wilderness for forty days, being tempted by the devil. And he ate nothing during those days. And when they were ended, he was hungry. The devil said to him, “If you are the Son of God, command this stone to become bread.” And Jesus answered him, “It is written, ‘Man shall not live by bread alone.’” And the devil took him up and showed him all the kingdoms of the world in a moment of time, and said to him, “To you I will give all this authority and their glory, for it has been delivered to me, and I give it to whom I will. If you, then, will worship me, it will all be yours.” And Jesus answered him, “It is written, ‘You shall worship the Lord your God, and him only shall you serve.’” And he took him to Jerusalem and set him on the pinnacle of the temple and said to him, “If you are the Son of God, throw yourself down from here, for it is written, ‘He will command his angels concerning you, to guard you,’ and ‘On their hands they will bear you up, lest you strike your foot against a stone.’” And Jesus answered him, “It is said, ‘You shall not put the Lord your God to the test.’” And when the devil had ended every temptation, he departed from him until an opportune time (Luke 4:1–13)
We’ve all been there. Maybe it’s New Year’s Resolution time, and you are ready to buckle down on those plans for organization, exercise, or budgeting. And yet you doubt that this time you will stick with your grand plans. Or you respond to the slightest provocation with irritability, yelling, or a harsh word and you feel discouraged that it’s happened again. You’re ashamed of your lack of self-control.
Self-control, restraint, responsibility—it goes by many names, but at the heart, there is a dignified desire for order and control. We often tend to view self-control as an exercise in restriction and suppression. An effort to fight back our desires and energies for the orderly life in mind, body, and even spirit. This version of life may sound like propriety but it doesn’t always seem very fun. Order and control, but without enjoyment.
In his paraphrase of the Bible, The Message, Eugene Peterson describes the Spiritual fruit of self-control as “directing our engines wisely.” This phrase helps to illuminate a more complex and nuanced meaning of self-control. In our performance-oriented culture, we see self-control as the will power to say no to chocolate cake, the self-discipline to exercise every day or train for an event. Of course, willpower and discipline are a part of self-control, but there is far more. By Peterson’s paraphrase we begin to see that Biblical self-control is less about suppression and more about direction. The Spirit’s fruit of self-control allows us to say NO so that we can say YES.
In the story of Jesus’s temptation in the wilderness, we see self-control manifest. Time and again Satan comes to Jesus tempting him with legitimate human longings: hunger and physical needs, significance and power, worship and authority. Yet we see Jesus wisely directs his energy, not to the immediacy of his human desires (though he does not demean them), but to the good plan of God. Jesus didn’t tell Satan that he wasn’t hungry; he directed his hunger and desire toward the good and beautiful word of God. Jesus’s self-control allowed him to focus his love and mission—Jesus said no to Satan so that he might say yes to redemption and rescue.
In my life, saying no or having self-control can feel overwhelming because I am often bad at it. But, by the work of the Holy Spirit and the fruit of self-control in me, I am learning that saying no to anger, apathy, or urgency allows me to yes to the purpose and good that God has for me.
Urgency leads me to rush the process and keeps me from paying attention. If you’ve ever used avocados, you know this tension of waiting until the avocado is ready—rush the process and you get crunchy guacamole; stop paying attention and your avocado is mush.
I am learning to say yes to paying attention to Jesus and to the good, beautiful things of God. Learning to desire the right things rightly. This kind of self-control is often difficult and effortful; it takes practice and training. But it is not driven by shame over what I have or have not done. Paul encourages believers with this truth: “Now the Lord is the Spirit, and where the Spirit of the Lord is, there is freedom.” (2 Corinthians 3:17) Life in the Spirit promises freedom, not shame, fullness, not lack. Spirit-generated self-control creates room to pursue God and his purpose, to find joy in the constraints of my yeses, full life in my limits.
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CONSIDER
What are places where your life feels out of control?
How might you begin saying yes and no as an exercise of self-control?
Our communities ask a lot of us, and it's often hard to say no. Are there any places where you are sacrificing your boundaries and limitations as a way to avoid exercising self-control?
Where are you wasting your energy? How might you use your energy more wisely?
Reflect Further
Read Proverbs 16:32, 18:21, 25:28. How do these proverbs illustrate the value and impact of self-control? How do they demonstrate the importance of “directing our energies wisely”?
Read Psalm 16:5-6.How does the Psalmist’s language help you to understand the beauty of living within the limits God has created for us?
Artwork by Tess Miller. Additional design by Rachel Lee.
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